Bring Up Money with Your Significant Other
Money. It’s a crucial part of everyday life, and yet few of us feel comfortable discussing it with those we know best: our significant other. And we’re not just talking about new couples. Even those who have been together for decades struggle to broach the subject.
Though a taboo to many, it’s hugely important to talk about money.
Luckily, our simple tips can help to dispel your — and your partner’s — discomfort around the topic. Read on for ways to bring up money with your significant other.
Identify Your Own Feelings Towards Money
Before you launch into a full-blown conversation about money, you may want to examine your own relationship with it. You’ll have likely established your own saving tactics and budgeting skills. Have you identified both your short-term and future financial goals?
However light or heavy you expect your discussion to be, if you understand your own feelings, you’ll be better able to explain them to your partner.
This could be particularly useful if you’re feeling nervous about the conversation. If you want to further ease your worries, you could always write down what you want to say beforehand.
Having prepared, you’ll likely feel more confident while talking about money and the task won’t seem as daunting.
Discuss Your Lifestyle Goals Together
Money can be a personal subject, so if you’re in the early stages of your relationship you may not want to discuss it with your partner just yet.
Instead, why not introduce the subject of lifestyle goals?
That way, you’ll be able to learn more about their spending habits and their attitude towards money without seeming too forward.
You could ask them what their plans are for the holiday season, for example. Or why don’t you ask them about their long-term goals for the coming 12 months?
Do they intend to make a big investment?
Perhaps they want to put money into savings? Your chat will most likely reveal what they aim to do with their earnings. Also, whether their spending priorities align with yours.
This will give you clarity on merging your finances with your partner in the near future.
Listen Without Judgement
Let’s face it, talking about money can be tough, no matter how long you’ve been with your partner. Very often, one of the best things that either of you can do is to simply listen to one another with patience.
While it’s usually easy to snap or shout if someone doesn’t agree with us.
Particularly if that person is our partner.
It’s almost always healthier to respond calmly to something we don’t agree with.
Listen carefully to what they have to say, and you’ll be better able to work through your disagreement together to find a solution that works for both of you.
Even if you don’t manage to sort out your money conflict immediately. By listening — and not jumping to respond — you can each take a breather.
Then you can consider a way to deal with the situation, before calmly sharing it with one another.
Create a Budget That Works for Both of You
A relationship is effectively a close-knit team, so why not reflect this in your budget? Create a joint cash flow — factoring in all your individual and collective needs.
You’ll be more likely to stick to it.
Better still, you’ll have the opportunity to grow closer together through the activity. You never know, maybe you’ll find swapping saving tips and tricks with one another fun!
By ensuring that each of you has equal influence over the budget, you’ll be able to boost the sense of equilibrium within the relationship.
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This could help you to grow in confidence, both as individuals and as a couple.
Who knows how much you could end up saving through carefully budgeting as a team?
Whoever said that discussing money has to be hard?
So long as you approach the topic wisely, this kind of conversation can run smoothly.
So, what’s to stop you and your partner from boosting your finances together?
Do you have any tips on how to bring up money to your significant other?
Let me know, til then–cheers m’deres!
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Nancy Polanco is a freelance journalist, lifestyle content creator, and editor of Whispered Inspirations. She is a proud Mom to Gabby and Michaela, and wife to Darasak. Having worked as part of a health care team for almost a decade, Nancy is happy to be back to her passion. She is a contributor to the Huffington Post, TODAY’s Parents, and an Oprah Magazine Brand Ambassador.